Blogdom,
Have you ever noticed that time changes EVERYTHING? Yes, everything.
My friend was telling me a story on how a year ago, at around this time, he was on a delayed honeymoon with his then wife. It was a good honeymoon by most people's standards I think. They had a good rest from their work, they were on an island, they snorkelled for the first time, they ate and ate and ate, had karaoke, read books, made new friends.
A year on, my friend, Am and the now ex-wife are fighting for scraps in the Syariah courts over a marriage that went sour some months ago.
At her wife's request, my friend granted the wife's wish to leave the marriage. It was on a fateful October 13th 2003 when Haza, the wife asked to leave the marriage.
Am's work day ended normally enough. At about 10pm he called home to ask Haza whether she wanted dinner.
Their professional lives really left little time to eat at reasonable hours. It was almost always packed food.
"I feel like KFC, want some?", Am asked.
"I share you punya ajelah okay?", she replied.
And so it was, when Am arrived at their home in a suburb in Selangor, he sat himself down in front of the tv. Haza was on the two-seater sofa, reading.
She sauntered down to the floor, and Am fed her the chicken as he had some himself. They talked about something as they ate, more often than not it would be her day at work, and how disorganised her team was.
After the meal, Am went to the kitchen to clean up. Then he sat himself down on the three-seater sofa across from where Haza sat.
Then he asked her the question that had troubled him over the whole week.
"Are you happy in this marriage Haza?".
She seemed stunned. As usual with Haza, she took a while to respond, and the response was expected.
"Why do you ask?".
Am then related to her incidences that led him to ask the question. Like how she would leave the family hall in the house into the bedroom to go to sleep, without so much as saying goodnight. Or how she would leave their table at a restaurant without telling him, to go shopping.
There was another incident a few weeks earlier. After attending lectures for a part-time course she was signed-up with at a local university, Haza found the front passenger window pane broken.
She promptly called Am to relate the incident. Am was aware that she had to attend an event in Sunway that evening.
"Right, you drive up to Subang where I'll meet you", Am said. "You take my car, and I'll tend to replacing the pane ok?"
Haza agreed. They met at the appointed place, exchanged cars and proceeded to each other's destinations.
"Until today, you have not asked me where i got it done, at what cost and you have not even thanked me", Am said, maintaining calm.
There was a long silence after that, which is typical Haza. Am was quite used to this. He'd wait for a while.
Then he asked, "Why?".
A little more silence then she muttered, "I don't love you anymore".
"And what do you want to do now?", Am asked very calmly, almost knowing the answer, really.
After a short pause, Haza muttered, "I want us to separate amicably".
"And by that you mean divorce?", Am enquired.
Am's question was one of those that you ask out of momentum. Her statement "separate amicably" could only mean one thing.
Haza nodded, the Am stood up, walked across to her and said, "I will grant you the divorce. But please file the papers".
Some three months later Haza still had not filed papers. Am finally did, on the grounds that Haza had verbally asked for the divorce.
On February 16th 2004, Haza and Am were divorced, exactly 2 years and 2 days after they married.
And two months later, Haza filed three separate claims totalling some RM35,000 from Am, including a RM20,000 claim for muta'ah. They've had two arbitration sessions since the claim was filed late April, and another set for June 14th.
So much for love.
That's about all the time I have for tonight. If you want to know more, perhaps I'll write some more as Am relates it to me.
Regards.
Have you ever noticed that time changes EVERYTHING? Yes, everything.
My friend was telling me a story on how a year ago, at around this time, he was on a delayed honeymoon with his then wife. It was a good honeymoon by most people's standards I think. They had a good rest from their work, they were on an island, they snorkelled for the first time, they ate and ate and ate, had karaoke, read books, made new friends.
A year on, my friend, Am and the now ex-wife are fighting for scraps in the Syariah courts over a marriage that went sour some months ago.
At her wife's request, my friend granted the wife's wish to leave the marriage. It was on a fateful October 13th 2003 when Haza, the wife asked to leave the marriage.
Am's work day ended normally enough. At about 10pm he called home to ask Haza whether she wanted dinner.
Their professional lives really left little time to eat at reasonable hours. It was almost always packed food.
"I feel like KFC, want some?", Am asked.
"I share you punya ajelah okay?", she replied.
And so it was, when Am arrived at their home in a suburb in Selangor, he sat himself down in front of the tv. Haza was on the two-seater sofa, reading.
She sauntered down to the floor, and Am fed her the chicken as he had some himself. They talked about something as they ate, more often than not it would be her day at work, and how disorganised her team was.
After the meal, Am went to the kitchen to clean up. Then he sat himself down on the three-seater sofa across from where Haza sat.
Then he asked her the question that had troubled him over the whole week.
"Are you happy in this marriage Haza?".
She seemed stunned. As usual with Haza, she took a while to respond, and the response was expected.
"Why do you ask?".
Am then related to her incidences that led him to ask the question. Like how she would leave the family hall in the house into the bedroom to go to sleep, without so much as saying goodnight. Or how she would leave their table at a restaurant without telling him, to go shopping.
There was another incident a few weeks earlier. After attending lectures for a part-time course she was signed-up with at a local university, Haza found the front passenger window pane broken.
She promptly called Am to relate the incident. Am was aware that she had to attend an event in Sunway that evening.
"Right, you drive up to Subang where I'll meet you", Am said. "You take my car, and I'll tend to replacing the pane ok?"
Haza agreed. They met at the appointed place, exchanged cars and proceeded to each other's destinations.
"Until today, you have not asked me where i got it done, at what cost and you have not even thanked me", Am said, maintaining calm.
There was a long silence after that, which is typical Haza. Am was quite used to this. He'd wait for a while.
Then he asked, "Why?".
A little more silence then she muttered, "I don't love you anymore".
"And what do you want to do now?", Am asked very calmly, almost knowing the answer, really.
After a short pause, Haza muttered, "I want us to separate amicably".
"And by that you mean divorce?", Am enquired.
Am's question was one of those that you ask out of momentum. Her statement "separate amicably" could only mean one thing.
Haza nodded, the Am stood up, walked across to her and said, "I will grant you the divorce. But please file the papers".
Some three months later Haza still had not filed papers. Am finally did, on the grounds that Haza had verbally asked for the divorce.
On February 16th 2004, Haza and Am were divorced, exactly 2 years and 2 days after they married.
And two months later, Haza filed three separate claims totalling some RM35,000 from Am, including a RM20,000 claim for muta'ah. They've had two arbitration sessions since the claim was filed late April, and another set for June 14th.
So much for love.
That's about all the time I have for tonight. If you want to know more, perhaps I'll write some more as Am relates it to me.
Regards.
Comments
You'll find this space therapeutic, no doubt. A place where old dear friends can catch up with you, new friends can learn more about you; a place where pent-up feelings can be released and where words can be said without fear or favour. It sounds exactly like something you needed, and it looks like youve already made yourself quite at home here.
To many more truths and voices heard,
Cheers :)